


Petty Doesn't Look Good on Us

by thekumquat



Series: Proposals Are Hard [1]
Category: Cable and Deadpool, Deadpool (Comics)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, with just a pinch of angst for flavor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 11:41:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16085411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thekumquat/pseuds/thekumquat
Summary: Nathan is sick of people not taking his relationship with Wade seriously. He has an idea to fix the problem. Wade...does not like this solution.





	Petty Doesn't Look Good on Us

Wade was startled awake from his nap on the couch by someone slamming the door so hard the entire room shook. There was only one person it could be, but said person was not usually the door slamming type. Nevertheless, it was Nathan Summers who stomped by without so much as a word. His shoulders were tense, his jaw clenched, his expression downright murderous.

“Well hello sunshine. How was work today?”

He got no answer. Nathan stalked right by and banged his way into the bedroom. Wade hurriedly did a mental check of everything he’d done in the last week that might merit such a response and came up empty. Even checking further back yielded nothing he hadn’t already been in trouble for. Someone _else_ had incurred the Wrath of Cable and now Wade was going to suffer for it.

**not like that. he just means we’re probably not getting laid tonight.**

_and isn’t that cruel enough?_

Nathan emerged from the bedroom dressed in civvies and still radiating fury.

“So that’s it? No kiss hello? Not even a head pat?”  

Nathan stalked into the kitchen. Wade could hear him rattling around in the liquor cabinet, fixing himself a drink. He harrumphed.

“Well fine. Be that way. I’ll just be over here, unkissed and unloved. Don’t mind me.”

Nathan came out of the kitchen. He wasn't holding his drink, which mean he was at that state of angry where he couldn't get anything done. His hands were on his hips, and though he was glaring at Wade, Wade was pretty sure he wasn't glaring  _at_ Wade. 

“Marry me.”

Wade fell off the couch.

**what?**

_what?_

“ ** _What?_** ”

“Marry me,” Nathan repeated. He still looked like he was ready to strangle someone to death with his bare hands, which put a pretty significant damper on the romance of the moment.  

“I- B- Wha- I- What?”

Nathan began to pace.

“I am so _sick_ of people acting like our relationship is some sort of joke! Insinuating that I’m sleeping with you to keep you in line, calling you my “pet mercenary”—

“Kinky.”

“--as if the idea that I could actually love with you is impossible! I’m sick of it!” Nathan slammed his fist (the not-robot one, fortunately) against the wall. Quietly, almost to himself, he said “They’ll have to believe it if we get married. They’ll _have_ to acknowledge that it’s real.”

Wade was still on the floor where he’d fallen, staring up at Nathan uncertainly. He didn’t like the vindictive glint in Nathan’s eye. He should have felt giddy and excited that Nathan “monogamy is an outdated concept that doesn’t exist in my future” Summers wanted to put a ring on it, but he didn’t.

He felt…

_disappointed?_

**unsettled?**

Angry.

“No.”

Nathan straightened, shoulders relaxing a little. Wade felt a sting of further irritation, realizing that he hadn’t even been _listening_ , he’d just _assumed_ , the way he always did when he was at his most up-his-own-butt.

“The county clerk’s office is probably closed by now, but if we went in the morning—“

“Nathan,” Wade said calmly from the floor.

“—try to get there when they open so we don’t—“

“ _Nathan!”_

“What?” 

Wade stood up and brushed himself off. There was nothing to brush away, but he wanted the excuse not to make eye contact, and a moment to reassure himself that this was really how he wanted to take this conversation. Marriage might be kind of nice, so long as he could look at a ring and not think every time about a proposal that started with “I am so sick of people”.

**that’s not our jam.**

_or our jelly._

“I said no.”

“… _what?”_

“Negative. Nyet. Nein. No marriage license, no county clerk, none of it. I don’t want to get married.” To continue not looking at Nathan, he fussed with his shirt.

In that wounded, kicked-puppy, how-could-you-when-I’m-only-trying-to-do-what’s-best-for-you voice that Wade hated more than anything in the world, Nathan said “I thought you loved me.”

Wade’s head snapped up, and he pinned Nathan with a glare so fierce the man actually took a step back.

“ _Fuck you_. I am not saying no because I don’t want to marry you. I am saying no because you are not asking because _you_ want to marry _me._ You are asking me out of _spite_. I am not going to marry you just because you want to prove a point.”    

“I want them to take you seriously—“

“No! You want them to take _you_ seriously! Nobody takes me seriously; nobody has ever taken me seriously! People have been giving me shit about our relationship since _momento uno_ , and getting married wouldn’t change that!”

Nathan looked shocked.

“You never said… why didn’t you tell me? Who said something to you?”

“Literally everyone, and I never said anything because it doesn’t matter to me! _I_ know you love me. _You_ know _I_ love you. I am not—“ To his surprise, a lump had grown in his throat. And not the usual unexpected tumor, either. He had to swallow a few times before he could get the words out, and when they did, they were shaky. “Jesus, Nathan, all that talk about how monogamy and marriage isn’t a thing in the future and I’m _fine_ with it, okay, I’m fine with the way things are. I’m happy. But the fact that you’d be willing to put all that aside and get married out of _spite_ , just to be petty and prove a point and not because… not because…

“...Not because I loved you.” Nathan had the grace to look ashamed of himself, which was a rare treat. “You’re right. You’re right, I’m sorry. ” He crossed the room and put his hands on Wade’s shoulders. “That was…it was stupid of me to even suggest it. I’m sorry.”

“Wow, two apologies in one go, that’s a record for you,” Wade said weakly. Nathan pulled him into a tight hug and pressed their foreheads together. Wade said nothing for a while, letting the tension drain out of the air.

 “’Pet mercenary’, huh?”

Nathan actually growled. It was kinda hot. Wade brushed his fingers across Nathan’s jaw, tilting his head up to meet his eyes.

“Hey. Fuck ‘em, Nate, seriously. If thinking this is some plot of yours to keep me under control lets them sleep better at night, that’s their damage. _I_ know you love me. I don’t give a shit what anyone else thinks.”

At last, Nathan smiled, though it was rueful.

“I do love you,” he said. Wade leaned up and kissed him, soft and slow.

“I love you, too.”

Nathan smiled down at him, then tilted his head thoughtfully.

“ _Do_ you want to get—”

“Ah ah ah!” Wade put a finger to Nathan’s lips. “Shhhh. _If_ you were going to ask me that question for real, you would have to put some effort into it. Dinner at an expensive restaurant, flowers, fireworks, a little speech, maybe even a band.”

“Are those mandatory?” Nathan mumbled past Wade’s finger.

“Those are suggestions. But it has to involve a ring and you down on one knee. That’s non-negotiable.”

Nathan reached up and took Wade’s hand in his, the corner of his eyes crinkling in that fond way that always made Wade’s heart do little flips.

“Noted.”

(When it does happen, there isn’t a ring, but there _is_ a giant monster that feeds on emotions, and proposing in front of all the X Men produces such a complex wave of joy-horror-delight-fear-disgust from everyone present that the monster’s brain explodes.)

(And he goes down on one knee, so that’s alright.)


End file.
